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Learning to love yourself
Self love is a something I think people generally take for granted. I recently started campaigning for self-love because I realized how much of a difference it brings into a person’s life. It is funny, but we forget that we can escape from everyone else, except ourselves. Lacking self-love, just makes life seem more difficult because you’re don’t love the way you are, you subject yourself to all kinds of wrong thoughts and actions. Over the course of my journey to loving myself, I have learned a few things about how to truly love myself.
Now, is it possible to love EVERYTHING about oneself? Trust me, it’s not. As human beings, we are built to be imperfect, and definitely, there are some traits and habits we have, that we would rather be without. But the key to loving oneself is accepting those faults and deciding to be better.
Accepting oneself completely means knowing you have faults and embracing those faults as part of who you are. For example, someone who has a habit of gossiping may not like it, but he/she has to accept that as part of who they are at that time. The first step to changing yourself is accepting what that something needs to change.
Don’t care what people think
Another part of loving oneself is not caring what people think. Let me tell you a secret. No matter what you do, someone somewhere has something to say about it. If you look outward for approval and acceptance, you would live in a cage of condemnation and criticism. For your peace of mind, never let what people have to say about you get to you. Once you shift the source of your love inward, there would be a yearning for personal growth and advancement.
I’ve been called weird and strange more times than I can count. At first, the words really bothered me and I was really self-conscious, until one day, I looked into the mirror and realized, I’m not weird, I’m not strange, so why do I let the words bother me?
Fill the void
I think the answer to why we let external things affect us is that there is a void we try to fill with different things. For me, after looking for different things to make me feel whole, I found God and with Him, I feel complete in the way I am and propelled to achieve greater things. I also had to find out the things that brought me the most happiness, like writing. Find what works for you and makes you happy, when you feel good about yourself, It’s easier to love everything that comes with you.
Appreciate the progress
If you have started working on yourself, don’t keep regretting past mistakes. Let them go and turn the page. Recognize and appreciate that you are not where you used to be. For most bad or unproductive habits, it takes time to completely stop, so if you get frustrated with the length of time it’s taking, you may end up giving up. Even if the progress you have made is minimal, every step forward is a step away from who you used to be and a step closer to who you want to be. Be proud of your successes and let them push you to achieve more.
Let them go
Now, this may be the hardest part of loving yourself, but also the most necessary. We all have those things that we know we don’t need in our lives. It may be a habit, or an object, or a place, or even a person that constantly makes you sad or upset. I have a question I ask myself when trying to decide what to let go of. Does this thing bring me happiness and/or help me progress? If the answer is no, I usually have to find a way to distance myself from that thing or person and sometimes, completely remove it from my life. Some things and people are definitely harder to let go of than others, but in the end, the most important thing to you should be your well being and progress.
You owe yourself the love that you so freely give to other people.
Loving yourself is not an easy or short-term goal to achieve. Once the journey starts, you’ll have to accept things, let things go and maybe even start over. But in order to move from where you are to where you want to go, some things have to change. It took me a while to realize just how important self-love is and how it affects everything in my life. I accept that I’m not where I want to be yet, but I am working on genuinely and completely loving myself. I hope you found this useful. Keep being encouraged, and stay motivated.